Random Ramblings

Bet that got your attention, didn’t it? Wouldn’t we all like to earn a bit extra. Well, the blogger from LEARN Me Good has designed the perfect pay plan. I vote we toss out testing bonuses and go with this salary schedule:

Sign us on at some base salary — let’s say $25,000. But we can increase our take-home by documenting events from the following list. Teachers would get paid for every occurrence of the event, not just one time.

Staff Meeting $200

Fire Drill $150

Being pulled out of class to attend a meeting $500

Receiving a new child any day after the first day of class $1,000
– if they don’t speak English $2,500

Parent conference — on the phone $100
Parent conference — in person $300
Parent conference – w/ irate or irrational parent $750

Administering a standardized test $250 per child

Child talking back $25

Child cussing at you $75

Child flipping you the bird $50

Child giving you the RING finger and then saying, “What?!? It’s not the middle finger! I never flipped the bird at you!!” $49.50

Child whining, “They’re skipping!” $25

Child disrespecting your clothes $10

Child disrespecting your hair $15

Child disrespecting your car $20

Child disrespecting yo momma $150

Child threatening to harm you $500

Child throwing and hitting you with:
an eraser $100
a crayon $200
a pencil/pen $500
a book $1,200
the student next to them $7,500

Child slapping you $2,000

Child punching you $5,000

Child kicking you $4,000

Too funny! Just when we needed it most – with testing stress all around us. Gotta love this guy! John Pearson is selling his book, LEARN Me Good on Amazon- I promise I’m not getting a kick back but that is an idea…..

Until next time ~ Danita

Flickr Why We Like Kids?

This entry was posted on Sunday, May 20th, 2007 at 8:20 pm Filed under Blog, Funny, Teachers and. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.